Soul Rx

I heard an interesting book title the other day. I have no idea what the book is about so this isn't a book endorsement but the title has stuck with me.

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The Cure for Anything is Saltwater

I have thought and thought about those words, and I love them. I love what they bring to mind. When I think of saltwater, I automatically think of the ocean and what it does in me.

There are few places that make me feel like the ocean makes me feel. There is no place that smells like the ocean, that feels like the ocean, that sounds like the ocean and nothing that looks like the ocean. There is nothing that feels like saltwater on my lips, like sand in my hands or the grains crunching in my mouth for that matter.

And the sun. The way that the morning feels before the sun comes up is so different than the way the gentle sun feels in the early morning which is different than the way the individual rays can be felt at noon which is different than the melting colors of dusk that need a sweatshirt to finish the day.

I can't pick what part of that day is my favorite, I just know that all of them put together are powerful. When I sit on the beach and look past the water into the sky, it forces me to acknowledge that there is Something that made that, Something that is so much bigger than me, Something that is stronger, more beautiful, more intense than just something.Me

So I am in complete agreement, saltwater is the cure for what ails me. -
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Something about the ocean

Makes me rise up and praise

Something about the heavens

Makes me stand in awe again

Something about the sunrise

Reminds me of Your faithfulness

Something about the ocean

And I'm lost in love again

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"Much" by Ten Shekel Shirt

Memories of last night

What do Sandy, Doody, Jan, Marti, Sonny, Frenchie, Danny and Rydell High have in common? ME! I got to see them all last night! I got to go with 2 of my best friends and my best aunt to dinner and a show and it was AWESOME. I shed my mommydom for a few hours, got dressed up and went out for a big girl dinner! The food was awesome, the show was great but the company was the best of all. So thank you Peggybelle, it was the perfect night.

WE ARE

We are back in OH. I have lived in lots of states and I love being a Buckeye. I love Ohio State. I love Wooster. I love Cleveland, the Indians, Cedar Point, I love Mt. Adams, I love the Ohio River, I love watching the horses and buggies in Wayne County, I love the state fair, I love Mohican State Park, I love the Goodyear blimp, I love Lake Erie, I love Carillon Park, I love Coccia house pizza, I love the Barn, I love Annie Oakley's home, I love the Riverfront, I love 71.

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But this past weekend in Pennsylvania made me realize there is another state that will keep part of my heart. It was a lot harder than I thought going back to PA, I miss it so much more than I realized. I love love loved our time there. The things that seemed so annoying when I was first a PA resident are the things that I miss. Number one, Pennsylvanians say P-A, not Pennsylvania, no other state that I know of refers to their state by their initials. Number two, the inflection when PA peeps ask a question, if you've heard it, you know what I mean. Instead of going up at the end, it goes up in the middle and down at the end. Annoying indeed but now endearing.

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I guess that's how it always goes. The further removed from something we are the greater it becomes, sort of like Godfather's pizza. But I miss PA. I miss my friends, I miss Wegmans, the Autoport, Steeler fans, I miss climbing Mt Nittany with Katy ;) , I miss my church of which we are technically still members, I miss 14 deer in our yard, oddly enough, I miss our old house and especially our neighborhood and listening to the football games from our porch. We got to walk through our old house since friends bought it, it was definitely a little weird. As Sean and I were driving through the Happy Valley, we realized part of what we miss so much. State College is beautiful. Aesthetically State College beats the crap out of southern Ohio.

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I know things aren't the same there. Stuff changes. Life continues on whether the Murphy's address is 124 Oakmont Rd with an amazing view of Beaver Stadium or not. That in itself stings a little...

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So here's to PA, the place that offered such hope, happiness and recovery for me. Sigh.

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"If God isn't a Penn State fan, why is the sky blue and white?"

Thoughts on Mem Day '07

1 - We are back from the greatest wedding ever with the most beautiful bride ever seeing the best people ever and laughing with the funniest, gorgeousest maid of honor ever

2 - Happy late bday Sarah! I can't wait until our night

3- The pool is open and I am giddy

4 - 4 more days of school

5 - Parker had her first pedicure

An apple, a broom, a cheetah, a doorknocker...

As the countdown continues, I am trying to get all the things together that we may possibly need for this trip. Swimsuits, tuxedos, crayons, pillows, blankets, pacifiers, snacks, hair bows, books, diapers, Nate the Pig, 590 other things I'll forget, and a portable dvd player (thanks PB, you are the greatest aunt! the trip just got so much easier).

But I know full well that the only thing the talking Murphy boys will want to do is play a car game. These "games" are fun for about 54 seconds for me. So I am enlisting your help.

What is the best car game you know?

And 3 days until this...Griffin is literally jumping up and down right now.

3 Days...

and I can barely stand it.

Hubble philosphy

As the old saying goes, "Out of the mouths of babes." Everyone knows there is such innocence and truth when kids speak. And as tough as the world is, kids seem to have an amazing understanding of it all. I often wonder if kids have this simplistic way to make sense of this complicated, intense and at times chilling world so that adults can be reminded of the things that matter, of the important things, of the way it should be. Things with kids are just so easy and simple, that's it. Such truth coming from such an unlikely source. When the world starts taking its punches and knocking us around, we become accustomed to the hurt and scars that we are left with. Thankfully most children have time before they are worn and torn by the world.

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All that to say, I heard an explanation for something profound this weekend. The mystery of the night sky was solved by someone other than the One who created, placed and named all those stars.

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"What do you think the tooth fairy does with all those teeth she gathers? I think I figured it out. I think the tooth fairy gives all the teeth she gets to God and he puts them in the sky as the stars. That's the only way those stars could be so bright."

-Griffin Murphy

I hate stuffy noses. On me, my kids or anyone else for that matter. They are gross feeling, looking and sounding. I don't understand how they work either which annoys me. Why does one side get stuffed and not the other? Why doesn't anything come out when I blow my nose? Why do I see stars when I blow my nose? Why do I sound like a cartoon character when I talk? Aren't there any doctor types that can shed some light on that?

My nose is now red and sore from being abused by a tissue so much. After my last night, I feel so much worse for Parker and her sleepless nights and runny nose and sore ears and achy body. I slept fitfully at best. I was so tired because she hasn't been sleeping well so I was very excited to go to sleep. All I know is I would drift off for about 15 minutes, wake up as my nose running down my face and then roll to the other side to try to unstuff the other side. At that point I almost turned to the baby bulb syringe and thought about giving it a shot.

(PS I also had tissues right by my bed so it isn't as nasty as it sounds.)

This went on for the better part of the night until I finally fell asleep around 3:30 for about three hours only to be barely up and barely at 'em again.

Now the kids are sleeping, my kitchen is a mess, the sun is shining but all I want to do it sleep. But I can't lest I shove a tissue up my nose and drift off to dreamland.

Summer colds = the worst

80% of the Murphy's are down for the count...

Great things before 8 AM

1 - Sleeping through a crazy thunderstorm

2 - Not knowing what time it is because the power is out

3 - Waking up to a 2 year old cuddled as tightly as possible to you

4 - Seeing Parker try 2 two things she hasn't tried before (saying Hi and waving)

5 - The smell of maple sausage cooking

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6 - Watching the sun try to bust through

Big game tonight!

Get Your Own!

How cute is this girl???

If I were computer literate, I'd make it bigger so you could all see her cuteness!

I often think I need a billboard to get my attention, to really give me the encouragement or advice that I need. I really hope that there isn't someone like me in Chicago. It seems as though there is a law firm of women who put this up and have taken all kinds of heat since then. But the rebuttal I heard was these ladies said, "We aren't encouraging divorce, we're encouraging happiness."

And here is my $.02...

I don't think we to be encouraged in the arena of divorce. Marriage is already temporary to the better part of the United States. There is a big chunk who think, "Aw, I sure hope this prince charming doesn't turn into an annoying A-hole" knowing full well what they'll do if he does. I did a search to find the number of lawyers who handle divorces and ironically, it took me to LexisNexis! And as one lawyer friend can attest, there are plenty.

There are some people in my life who are flummoxed that I don't watch Grey's Anatomy. And I often find myself defending that decision to some people. And my thoughts are that I really don't need to see affairs and love triangles that seem so appealing and so tied up with a bow in an hour to help me honor my husband and my marriage.

So I am sticking to no Grey's and a little more definitive to Annie billboards.

Happy Mother's Day

...to all the mommies.

Paris Hilton...

What more is there to say about that? I think I know what to think about this whole ordeal but that's another day...here is what most people think...

46,736 polled

96% think she should serve her jail time.

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Side note: It kind of feels like she is trying to portray two different images in these two pics.

I think my favorite name to write is Liz. I have a bunch of friends that go by Liz...

Liz Emerick

Liz Meenan

Liz Brashear

Liz Lutow

Liz Wolfe

Liz Caudill

Liz Moore

Liz Johnson

Lizzie McGuire

and I love writing them notes.

Columbus is 103 miles away. My family took a little day trip yesterday to watch an Olentangy Junior High School tennis match. They came out on top including a win from Connor and Hector.

While 103 miles may not seem like too far, here are a couple things I learned...

1 - Spilled apple juice stinks after a while

2 -Apparently I don't know the right way to play superheroes and villians

3 - My family watches a lot of reality tv

4 - The way back of a miniature van is fun for about a half hour

5 - My kids don't sleep well in the car

6 - Cooper can talk more than anyone in the history of ever

7 - I don't think Peggy will ever drive cross country with little Murphs

What do we do with feelings? I am new to those so I am really trying to figure what they are, what they mean and what to do with them when they arise.

As I talk to old friends from times that have passed in my life, I literally feel nausea in my stomach. I have talked to several old friends lately, my maid of honor, an old neighbor, a friend a little further ahead in life than I and as I do, so much gets stirred up. I hear about things that are going on in their lives and things that are happening in different states across the country and honestly I'm not sure how I feel about it. It is incredibly inspiring and motivating but it also hurts, whether a good hurt or bad, I don't know. I am not sure what the hardest part is...

I don't necessarily think it is one specific thing. But I think it has caused me to have a new found intensity for life and things that matter. I have realized it hurts to know I am replaceable. I am realizing that I turn to people for my worth, for company, for fulfillment. I am beginning to realize that I have such need for and find such validation in other people. I never thought I was much of a people pleaser nor do I think I am unaffected by people. But I realize that I find comfort and feel love from other people in ways that I hadn't realized. I count on people so much more than I ever knew. When things don't go the way I had planned or hoped, I have a huge let down because of the incredibly ridiculous expectations that I have placed on people. The expectations are unspoken and kept in my head where they fester and grow and don't help anyone.

And when I go for days, weeks, or even months without these relationships and then have several restored, I get huge pangs of sadness. I don't know if sadness is even the right emotion but it is the name I know to put with how I feel...until now.

I am longing. I long for relationships that don't have to end with hanging up the phone. I long for intimacy that is maintained only through time spent together, not just quality but tons and tons of quantity. I am longing for a heart that is full independent of another person. I long for beauty, beauty in a heart, in a face I have missed and most certainly in a morning I wake up to sun mixed with raindrops and a rainbow peeking through. I am desperate to be with people that fill me up and that I can fill up, surrounded by people that breathe life into me and I into them, separate from a world and a people that are hurt and that hurt.

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I can't help but think this is a human thing, not a boy/girl thing or adult/kid thing. The way we express it or the way we imagine it may differ but the longing has to be the same. If only I could recognize this longing as what it is, a longing for a heavenly place, a passionate place, an inspiring place where only One can satisfy.

All Conjecture

Griffin will be 5'11 when he is 18. So says a height predictor Griffin and I found on the world wide web. It said that based on some info I plugged in, his weight, age, parents heights. Apparently it is 90% accurate +/- 2 inches, obviously incredibly precise and methodical! I did do it twice when it said he would be 8'2 the first time. He has managed to be average if not a little above ever since he was born. It throws me though to think of him being 18 years old.

Parker will be 5'4 at 18. Granted she is maxing out the charts and just a bunch of baby right now but one day, a mighty 5'4, fairly average. Again hard to believe she will be a woman and taller than I one day.

In 2023, Cooper will be 18 and will tower above all at 5'3. Huh? Yep, 63 inches. I entered and reentered thinking the little man in the computer was wrong. Now at 2, he is about the cutest thing your eyes will ever see in all his below average little cuteness. But 5'3 +/- 2 inches? Really? I just watched the Saved By The Bell when Lisa tried to set up Jessie with Brett. And even though he was smart, funny, handsome, goal oriented, successful, private school attending and rich, it ended calamitously when they stood up at the Max and she towered over him. Oh poor Brett.

But the best part of all of this? If Cooper remains compact, the chances of him becoming a 4 time 103 lb HS state champ and 4 time 125 lb Big 10 and NCAA champ skyrocket!

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday dear Buddha

And we miss you too

Good Night

Sean is home!

Whew hoo!

And to celebrate, all the Murphs went to the YMCA. There were mad ball skills, some ping pong and lots of swimming. All followed by baths, some ice cream and Dinosaur ABC's. A good night indeed.