My new mantra

This day is bananas

B-A-N-A-N-A-S

A lady in Florida is dead... after her camel sat on her. It kind of seems like this would be easily prevented.

Stella

The reality is that the way I feel about this girl leaves me unable to describe it in words.

New York doesn't deserve you anymore, we need you back here.

I love you KLR.

Kentucky Gymnastics

I have a sweatshirt that I got in college that I spent, I think, $50 on. At that time that seemed outrageous and actually still does a little. I still have that sweatshirt and love it way more than I did then. It has holes in the cuffs in the exact right spot to put my thumbs, the entire circumference of the collar is about worn through and there is a tear down the front. This is also the sweatshirt I go for first on laundry day despite its manginess. I just did the math and assuming I have worn it once a week (but seriously, who we kidding), that works out to $.06 per wear.


We get to hang out with some friends this weekend. These are friends that we've had almost twenty years. That feels almost impossible to say...


It is such a crazy friendshipal history in that I have known the wife and Sean has known the husband since before Sean and I knew each other and any of us were couples. These are friends that are so comfortable and easy to be around, just a good fit. These are friends that have seen our rips and tears, big picture friends and day to day friends. I could never have imagined these friends that seemed just normal turning into $50 friendships that fit as well and will outlast that nasty old shirt. I can't wait until Saturday...

Two Beloveds

A little tribute to two of my favorites.

One has been a instant favorite since meeting him over 10 years ago amid rice crispy treats and SMM dominating him at foosball. I am actually out loud laughing now as I think of some of his foibles. The other quickly becoming a favorite as I hear more and more about her and get to know her myself. Think how well we'd know each other if they became residents of southern OH-IO.

It is about time someone snagged this fella. I honestly don't know which of the two is luckier. Although as I think about it, I guess it is the Murphy's.

I am having a little trouble dealing with Mondays events. This is a flippin scary, messed up, weird place. Why couldn't we have heard about the record for most strawberries eaten in 10 minutes or see the greenest grass ever planted? Instead we hear about the biggest massacre on a college campus in US history. Great. A record I am guessing we could all do without. Brains are frightening places especially after hearing more of the details that have surfaced overnight. It is terrifying to think of pain that guy was in that made him feel like this was his best decision. It is also scarier that this was his choice. He thought this through, decided to go to the first dorm, go home, reload and go to the second. I hear it wasn't an automatic weapon which makes me think every single shot from his gun was another choice, another decision. I would love to think people are good at their core but days like yesterday prove otherwise.

Dreaming of Wednesday Addams

A relaxing Saturday afternoon was frickin ruined by a TV movie. Not a made for TV movie or even an after school special. I should have known. There were way too many clues but I couldn't stop. I just had to keep my eyeballs on the screen and let my retinas get burnt out. I had to keep on the down the path of visual destruction. I actually witnesses the worst movie ever in the history of ever. Pumpkin. That's the name of it. Pumpkin. I am still trying to figure out if it is a real movie and if it is WT...??????? It was a real, in the theaters, someone read the script and thought, "This is awesome, I'll do it", people actually paid for this movie. I think I will start a fund drive to get all 308,552 dollars so I can pay people back for enduring this.

It was this horrible mix of drama, heart string tugging, love, horribleness and I just don't know. There were parts that were so flipping wrong even for dark comedy. I don't understand how it could have been made. I have seen horrible movies, I sat through Beverly Hills Ninja AND Broken Flowers. But those are Best Picture winners compared to this. There can't be a worse movie, there just can't.

While I realize I just may not have the sense of humor for this, please, someone, anyone tell me you have seen this and either explain it or agree that I have had two hours of my life pillaged and plundered. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. I am going to crawl into the fetal position and mourn my violation.

Tulips and Twists

The Cone in West Chester, ahhhhhh. This little joint rivals anywhere, mice or not for the happiest place on earth. My family seems to have become regulars frequenting the Cone enough for them to know our names and for Griffin to say, "There's my friend Frank! Hi Frank!" to the owner, Keith. Last summer they anticipated Parker being born as much as I did. Someone sprinkled a little magic over that place.

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So the love flows even though this is where I locked my car keys in my purse in the car in the sunny but cold weather way past nap times yesterday. Next time someone else is driving. Thanks for saving me again SMM. xoxoxox

I knew I should have been a doctor

Todays lesson always known but really learned today: Grocery shopping with three kids is tough.


My kids were pretty well behaved but an hour of not much fun and lots of food unable to be eaten is hard for me too. While we were walking out, Cooper and I were holding hands and he tripped. He screamed and people of course stared thinking I was that mom. As he kept crying and wanted me to hold him, I figured the problem and agreed that I might cry too had my elbow dislocated when I fell.


Since this is the fifth time this has happened, I feel like I have a little experience in this area. An ER doctor once showed me how to fix it and apparently that was a smart move. I hold his elbow and palm in a supine position then raise him arm until I feel his elbow pop in. Normally, I love that kind of stuff. If I had my druthers and did things in a more traditional manner, I would have been a doctor. I love all kinds of things medicine with no reaction to blood. But, it is a little different when it is my child that is crying "Mommy!" and that Mommy is me.


There are some seemingly obvious directions to head with that but I'd like to go this way...


When we got home and I opened the van door, there was something that was stinking. I picked up Parker and started to take her inside and felt a warmth and wetness on my arm. I then held her in front of me and watched the warmth and wetness dripping onto the floor (you're welcome). When Dr. Joe told me the new antibiotic she was trying may give her diarrhea, he was not joking. And Griffin as usual summed it all up by saying, "Whoa, now what do we do? Man mom, this has been some morning!"


After all was cleaned, mopped, bathed, scrubbed and put to bed, we now have Popsicle soup and smashed bread, did I mention I stepped on the loaf?

Truth be told

"If anyone drives slower than you they are an idiot, if anyone drives faster than you, they are a maniac."

This man is so wise. It is interesting to me I find this so true. Honestly, is there anyone who doesn't? Except with me there is an f-ing a-hole added to it (courtesy of something Brashear ;)). How is it possible that we are a society that thinks if anyone isn't our clone, they are wrong, myself included. We have become people that think ours is the only way, stray from that and not only will our friendship change but I will think you a moron.

I remember when Griffin was born and Sean was changing his diaper. I literally had to leave the room because he wasn't doing it my way. I now see that neither way had any significant effect on his potty trainging or adjustment into boydom. But it was still such a problem for me that I had to remove myself from even watching it.

I think I am tired of having to be right at any expense. I am tired of fighting for everyone to think like me. I am tired of the stress that comes with any conflict in my life. I am going to go back to my thinking that there is ONE black and white for me and the other stuff is just that. Unimportant. I want to love better, communicate better. And I think I am going to give up needing to be right. I'd rather be healthy than right.

Little wins

It has been another day of tears...but these are good ones. It fact, it is a little ridiculous that there were even any at all, especially because they came as I was reading this note from Griffin's teacher.


As I read it and teared up, Griffin said, "Uh-oh Mom, whats it say?" And all I could do was tell him how proud I am and that he is turning into an awesome little man and he said with the hugest smile, "Just like Daddy!" At that point there was no hope for me not to cry.


Apparently I have discovered that I really do have emotions!

I am woman

Yesterday has to rank as one of the worst days I've had in my 12353.

I have been having a really tough time as of late. I am working through some stuff in my head that is just really hard. I am trying to figure out what is legitimate hardness and what is caused in part by my body going through some pretty significant withdrawal from a medicine that has sustained me for 16 years. This withdrawal has causes me to feel about as high as I ever did when I was using and that in itself brings up some weirdness too. In any case I was stressed out yesterday.

I had a meeting with a gal that I thought was supposed to be at 11 am, turns out she meant 12:50 pm. I had a bunch of just junk to do so I checked things off all morning. I had a frustration explosion in front of my middle son that I am now terrified will scar him for life. He handed me his toys and gave me big hugs and eventually just cried with me, although he cried because of a papercut he has milked for 3 weeks. My oldest son came home from school with a new cut and was hungry for lunch. All the while I am trying to outbid momof4 on ebay for a dumb dress for Parker.

Then it all starts...the love of Griffins life, Gailee called to ask if Griffin could come over to play. I loaded everyone up for a drive over to the future Mrs. Griffins and we headed out. I realized as we were pulling out of the driveway I had left my phone inside. "Aw forget it, we are only going to be gone for 20 minutes, who needs a phone?" So we drive on. All the while, Cooper and Parker are shoeless (a nice touch) and are missing their normal nap time but its ok, we will get naps as soon as we get home from Gailee's house. As we drive home we are on a way back road with not much but farmhouses and cows around. About the time I thought, "I'd love to live out here, it is so pretty and there is no one around to bug you" I thought whoa that is a loud airplane. I tell Cooper to look and try to find the airplane and we have no luck. I couldn't figure out why it was so loud and affecting my steering. Then there we have it, a flat back right tire...with two tired crying kids, a mom who is already eyeing the nearest cave to hide in, no phone and the stupid cow just staring at me. It was like the devil himself said, "Today I am I going to F with her" as he poked a hole in the tire.

The lane to an old farm is the setting for the next part of our story. As I tried to assess the damage with all my automotive knowledge, I can now confidently say that sucker was flat and the grinding was the rim I drove on until I figured that out. I began to dry my tears of panic and frustration and assure my kids I haven't gone totally crazy. I get the jack, tire iron and spare out and it took forever to get the thing out of the middle of the spare that keeps it hanging on the thing under the car in the holder thing. It finally popped out with a small cut and had anyone been around, they would have gotten an earful. The jack lifts the car, the tire goes on and I tried wiping my tears, again. A lady drives by and asked if I needed some help. To which I turn around and told her I am just having a tough day and thank you so much for stopping but I am fine. She looks at me oddly and says are you sure I can't get someone to help? And I turned my back and said, "God could you please at least help me stop crying????" I turned back to her so calm and like it was any other day and said again in the most nonreassuring way, "No really I am ok, thank you." Apparently I wasn't too convincing because these three guys approach and again look somewhat startled asking if I need help. I told them I was almost finished and the one gingerly asks, "Did you cut yourself? You have a blood and dirt all over your face." So looking back I think that may have been why I seemed a little more crazy than the usual tire changer.

We got home and I was at my limit. I got the kids to bed and made some calls to try to get this fixed. Sean saved my day when he came home early and took the car to get new tires. I called my girlfriend Holley who after she let me cry, she came over, gave me her car and stayed while my kids slept and went back to get Griffin at his woman's house.

The tire place put 4 new tires on, 3 just happened to have illegal tread. Who even know there was such a thing?

We made it to Griffin performance at his school,in the monsoon, still unshowered (anonymous, if your hope is to shatter someone, make a comment today). The songs were adorable and the kids were great. The final song was an LECC specific song that Rick and Roy wrote just for these kids. As they were singing, "this is a place for me, a place I have friends, a place I can learn and forever remember" I was never more thankful for Parker taking her shoes and socks off, I needed the socks to dab my tears. Cooper looked at me and I swear if he could have, he would have said, "Honestly? We are doing this again?" and then he hugged his Mama again.

All of this to say, some days suck and those days you end up sore and smelling like an old grandpa, bad. I am off to clean up the milk Cooper spilled from his cereal, no use crying over it.

Trendy Tuesday

The sun is feeling hotter, shining brighter and forcing sunglasses out of hibernation. I love this, love it. The arrival of sunglasses on many a face is indicative of summer. (One thing I don't get though is why it seems sunglasses make such a run in summer. Winter is sunny and bright too. [Don't mistake this for winter empathy.]) Sunglasses are good for so much, in honor of one Lizzy B, a short list...

1 - Keeping retinas healthy

2 - Hiding a rough nights sleep

3 - Cure for poor time management (ie no mascara)

4 - The best casual little hair accessory (that looks so easy to accomplish but we all know we practice in the rear view mirror to get it just right)

And my fave

5 - This finishing touch to my invisible no one can see me shield

I don't think that gals like Nic know that there is a limit to the hugeness of the lens. For those that are arachnophobic this is troublesome. At some point, I'd think she'd look in the mirror and think, "Jeez, I know I am all about the style but even I think I kind of look silly." I worry that as she gets skinnier and the glasses get bigger she may sprout 4 more limbs and complete her spideriffic transformation. The glasses are the widest things on her!

This is one AMDesigns is passing on. I don't think you will see me with sun spectacles bigger than my daughters head, even if they would lump me in with Nicole Richie. Again.

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Not sure we have a Freddy Adu but he had a great time and even got an assist.